{"id":79548,"date":"2020-06-04T06:17:14","date_gmt":"2020-06-04T10:17:14","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.owegopennysaver.com\/PS\/?p=79548"},"modified":"2020-06-04T06:17:14","modified_gmt":"2020-06-04T10:17:14","slug":"guest-editorial-the-dangers-of-i-know-how-you-feel-but-i-have-it-worse-during-the-covid-19-pandemic","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.owegopennysaver.com\/PS\/2020\/06\/04\/guest-editorial-the-dangers-of-i-know-how-you-feel-but-i-have-it-worse-during-the-covid-19-pandemic\/","title":{"rendered":"Guest Editorial: The Dangers of \u2018I Know How You Feel, But I Have It Worse\u2019 During the COVID-19 Pandemic"},"content":{"rendered":"

I was supposed to be gliding across the dance floor in an elegant, glittering merlot gown surrounded by my best friends celebrating before being torn away to different colleges. I was supposed to walk the stage with my whole family there to congratulate me for being the fourth person on my father\u2019s side to graduate from high school. I was supposed to have closure, to get to say goodbye to everything I\u2019ve ever known since I entered Pre-K as a wide-eyed three year old. <\/span><\/p>\n

Instead I\u2019m spending my last month or so of school locked in my house with no one but my family and the occasional Zoom call to keep me company. The general reaction to this is pity, soft sympathetic sighs and some half-hearted words of encouragement. <\/span><\/p>\n

Once in a while, however, my peers and I receive a \u201cI know how you feel, I\u2019m having a bad time too, I can\u2019t go to work and I might not be able to pay my taxes.\u201d Just like that my pain isn\u2019t only invalid, it\u2019s selfish. <\/span><\/p>\n

Recently a few celebrities have gotten in trouble for saying they know how we feel, but apparently people don\u2019t think it\u2019s wrong if they do it too. I agree, Kim Kardashian whining about how hard she\u2019s roughing it right now in her mansion sounds more like a privileged pity party than a genuine word of encouragement; but being told \u201cIt\u2019s just prom, other people have it worse\u201d succeeds in doing the same thing; making everyone else\u2019s hardships smaller. <\/span><\/p>\n

It may seem easy to stand on the outside and say, \u201cWe\u2019re all going through the same thing. This is a global issue.\u201d And while that is partially true, it\u2019s a gross overstatement of the suffering that stretches all across the globe. <\/span><\/p>\n

Think of life as an ocean. We are all in this tempest together. The waves are crashing up against the walls of all our boats. Some of us are in yachts and some of us are in leaky wooden dinghies. It would be very easy to say that the people on the yachts are not experiencing the storm because when you\u2019re sitting in a dinghy and can\u2019t see the deck it\u2019s easy to assume it\u2019s dry and warm up there. And it would be unfair for the people in the yachts to say that they know how it feels to be in the storm when, though they\u2019re drenched in rainwater, their boat is not sinking. <\/span><\/p>\n

But that\u2019s just it; both parties are dripping with rainwater. Both parties have wet clothes. Just because someone\u2019s clothes are less wet than yours doesn’t mean they\u2019re any less uncomfortable. The same goes for pain and grief. Pain is not some inky black liquid that can be measured in cups and quantified. You can\u2019t have your loss press its back against the back of someone else\u2019s and see which one is taller. <\/span><\/p>\n

Struggle can\u2019t be set on a scale. Grief can\u2019t be scooped up and rolled around in the palm of your hand. In the end, pain is pain. Any amount of pain should be taken seriously. Denying it or belittling takes the cup the other person poured their heart out into and dumps it on the floor. It makes their experiences seem like they are nothing, even though they are. <\/span><\/p>\n

We don\u2019t have a limit to how much pain is allowed in the world. We don\u2019t need to share the space where sorrow is stored. We don\u2019t need to fight each other for the right to feel sad as though it’s a title only one person can hold. <\/span><\/p>\n

What we need to do is be understanding and stop comparing our pain to others when it can\u2019t be quantified. Everyone is struggling right now, some more than others, but even those who \u201caren\u2019t struggling as much\u201d are still struggling and should be respected. <\/span><\/p>\n

(Note: Rachel Romeo is a senior in Chris Evans\u2019 Creative Writing Class at Owego Free Academy.)<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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