Today\u2019s doctors are smart, hip and well versed in the science of modern medicine. But, they\u2019re not schooled in old coot medicine. Even those that specialize in geriatrics aren\u2019t fully equipped for the task at hand. They know how a body is supposed to work. They just don\u2019t know how an OLD body works, or how the inhabitants of these high mileage vehicles make it through the day. <\/p>\n
Take pain, as an example. When you have a young body, or even a middle age one, pain is a signal that something is wrong. If it persists you are advised to seek medical attention, which means a trip to the emergency room or a walk in clinic since you\u2019re not getting in to see your regular doctor. I know. I used to try. Call in July and they\u2019ll squeeze you in before the end of the year. The system is geared to treat healthy people, not the sick. So, off we go to the ER or a walk-in facility, both of which are staffed with new, young doctors just starting out, for the most part. \u201cDescribe the pain in your leg on a scale of one to ten,\u201d they say. We don\u2019t use a one to ten scale to describe pain. Ours is a three level scale: It stings \u2013 It hurts like heck \u2013 It\u2019s killing me! But, that\u2019s not the real issue. Young docs can transpose our old coot scale to their one-to-ten scale. <\/p>\n
That\u2019s easy, because it\u2019s always a 10. Old guys go into a state of denial when a medical symptom emerges. We adopt a \u201cwait and see\u201d approach. Let it percolate for a while. We grew up this way. Run into the house after falling out of a tree when you were a kid and if a bone wasn\u2019t sticking out, all you got was a Popsicle and told to go sit in the back yard and read a comic book. ERs should amass a team to treat old coots, like they do at the Mayo clinic. We wouldn\u2019t be there unless it was something we couldn\u2019t figure out and were at our wits end. <\/p>\n
The team should be led by an old doctor, who would know better than to ask if we\u2019re having chest pains. Of course we\u2019re having chest pains; we have multiple chest pains every day. Make a wrong move and something hurts. Often, it\u2019s in the chest area. Any sudden move has an impact. If we twist to the left too fast, \u201cBoing!\u201d We get a chest pain, an arm ache and feel a little dizzy. Make a left turn in the car and there is a twinge in our neck. We thrive in a pain world, watching helplessly, as they race from limb to limb, torso to shoulder, head to toe. That\u2019s why it\u2019s so hard for us to describe what is going on when we get to the ER. But, an old doc on the staff would help with the issue. One who knows what it\u2019s like to live in, and travel around in a worn out buggy of a body. He could distinguish between the everyday cascade of old coot pains and focus on the new one. Or, give us a Popsicle and sit us down with a comic book. I\u2019d prefer an issue of Superman, one with a 10-cent price tab in the upper right corner of the cover. <\/p>\n