I\u2019m taking a cue from network TV, taking a break and rerunning some Old Coot articles. But, it won\u2019t be like the networks overuse of reruns. They run five or six new episodes of a show, starting in late September or early October, and then start the reruns. New episodes appear a month or so later, following weeks of advertising and hoopla! The average major media production of network shows is 16 original episodes a year. <\/p>\n
Back in my day, when rerunning shows was invented, it was a \u201csummer\u201d phenomenon. The new season began in September, like it does now, but it ran until June. Thirty plus episodes a year, and then summer reruns. <\/p>\n
Oh, how we groaned, we hated to be stuck with shows we\u2019d already seen. But, stuck we were, with only three channels to choose from (the three major networks). No cable channels. No cable! Just a metal antenna on the roof or a set of rabbit ears on top of the TV set, often with hunks of tinfoil dribbling off the \u201cears\u201d to bring in better reception or eliminate the \u201csnow\u201d that infringed on the picture. TV sets were the size of small refrigerators, sometimes with built-in record players and AM radio receivers. <\/p>\n
So, anyhow, I\u2019m giving in and submitting for publication a few reruns of my own. I have over 700 articles to pick from, dating back to 2003. If your memory is anything like mine, you probably would never know the difference, if I hadn\u2019t fessed up to the scam. Heck, when I read through one, to see if it\u2019s still pertinent, I don\u2019t recall ever writing it, so I think I can get away with a few reruns. Starting next week, the Old Coot Rerun Season will kick off. The first one is my eulogy to the now deceased, shiny, chrome car bumper. The second slams food producers for getting the \u201cportion size\u201d listed on the package wrong.<\/p>\n
To get you prepared, those of you that have read this far, I\u2019m including a partial rerun from an article that ran in 2009; the \u201cUm People,\u201d one of my favorite human nature observations. <\/p>\n
The Old Coot discovers the \u201cUM\u201d people.<\/b><\/p>\n
I was studying the \u201cUm\u201d people the other day. You know the type. They wait in line, staring at the racks of donuts in Dunkin Donuts, or the extensive menu at a fast food joint, but when their turn comes, they are dumfounded. The clerk says, \u201cHow may I help you?\u201d They reply with, \u201cUm.\u201d And after a long pause, continue with \u201cI think I want a dozen donuts,\u201d and another, \u201cUm.\u201d They tap their index finger on their chin and repeat it again, \u201cUm.\u201d \u201cUm.\u201d \u201cUm.\u201d Finally, they get started. \u201cGive me two jelly.\u201d That\u2019s followed with another, \u201cUm.\u201d All through the selection process the dialog is interspaced with ums. That\u2019s why I call them the Um people. They\u2019re never prepared for the task at hand. When the exasperated clerk finally gets their order together and says, \u201cThat will be seven dollars and sixty-eight cents,\u201d they shift back to their \u201cUM\u201d mode, with, \u201cUm, where did I put my wallet?\u201d Everything that comes their way is a shock. We all do this from time to time, but the \u201cUm\u201d people never get out of the groove.<\/p>\n