One is greater than five. That\u2019s the new math. Correction, the new \u201cold coot\u201d math. I\u2019m still getting used to it. It\u2019s hard to teach an old dog new tricks, but not impossible. I\u2019m an old dog who requires reading glasses (if I want to read or thread a needle for example). The issue started as I slid into my forties, and like all males, I denied it for years. I was ok under bright lights or out in the sun, but otherwise, everything blurred unless I held it at arms length. I finally gave in and had my vision checked. I ended up with a pair of bifocal reading glasses, big ones, as was the style back then. Some guys never moved on; you can spot them with glasses the size of fish bowls covering their face from below their nose to the top of their forehead. Not me! I must have purchased 150 pairs of cheap reading glasses and a few pair of \u201creal\u201d glasses over the last three decades, and little by little, the glasses got smaller and smaller.<\/p>\n
That\u2019s where the new math comes in. Where one is greater than five. I get a five pack of reading glasses about every 12 months. They\u2019re cheap, so they don\u2019t last long, especially when you sit on them or carelessly toss them around like I do. At the moment, I don\u2019t know where any of them are. When I had just one pair, I paid attention to where I put them down, but with five pairs, I don\u2019t bother. I toss them off or leave them behind when I\u2019m through looking at something. Pretty soon, five pair becomes four, then three and eventually none. I just ordered a new batch. As soon as I did, I stumbled on one of the lost ones. Which made it a lot easier to type this without having to lean back so far from the computer screen that my fingers barely reached the keyboard.<\/p>\n