[By Merlin Lessler]<\/p>\n
I read an article in the Wall Street Journal by Alison C. Cheperdak titled, \u201cIn Defense of the Irish Goodbye\u201d (leaving a party without saying goodbye may be the most polite option). The title really caught my interest because I know the consequences of saying goodbye: it will engage the \u201cGoodbye Process,\u201d a term I coined and explained in a 2005 Old Coot article. <\/span><\/p>\n In a few words, it extends leaving for many, many minutes from a man\u2019s viewpoint. When his wife says it\u2019s time to leave, he thinks they will be finding the hosts, saying thanks and goodbye. <\/span><\/p>\n But for his wife, it means going to everyone she had a conversation with, rehashing it, saying goodbye, and thanking the hosts. At minimum, the process takes 15 minutes. <\/span><\/p>\n The husband is standing with her, figuratively tugging at her sleeve, saying, \u201cCan we go now? Can we go now?\u201d <\/span>Like a five-year-old would do in a store with his mother. The male\/female roles can sometimes be switched, but that\u2019s not my experience!<\/p>\n For years, I have been accused of doing a disappearing act. I’d be at an event with a lot of people, and eventually, someone would ask, \u201cWhere did Lessler go?\u201d <\/span>– <\/span>\u201cOh, he\u2019s gone. He just leaves.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n I learned long ago that whether it\u2019s a cocktail party or just a bunch of people at a bar, if you say you\u2019re leaving, they always try to stop you. <\/span><\/p>\n