By Merlin Lessler —<\/p>\n
One of the drawbacks of being an old coot is the constant need to apologize! I spill stuff, not just on myself, but on my surroundings and people within range. Or when I forget to be somewhere or do something, like mailing a letter promptly instead of carrying it around for three days.<\/p>\n
Even worse, I tend to reminisce excessively about the good old days and the stuff I used to do. Like that afternoon in my 30\u2019s when I finally was able to run a mile in six minutes. (My one and only time, and it nearly killed me.) Yet, I\u2019m still inserting it into conversations 50 years later.<\/p>\n
After a while, you discover that just saying, \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d doesn\u2019t quite do the job with the person you insulted, spilled something on, or otherwise offended. You say, \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n
They frown at you and say, \u201cWhatever!\u201d<\/p>\n
You need a follow-up to your lame, \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d<\/p>\n
I learned the lesson the hard way. It was at a reception my company was holding for a U.S. senator. I accidentally spilled red wine on the front of his pristine white shirt. Our CEO stood beside him as the incident unfolded, glaring at me as I offered profuse apologies.<\/p>\n
The senator turned to him and said, \u201cGive the kid a break; somebody hit his elbow.\u201d (A lie.)<\/p>\n
Bottom line: I didn\u2019t get fired. A good thing! I had two daughters in college, one in high school, and another in middle school. That\u2019s when I learned to say, \u201cThank you for your forgiveness.\u201d<\/p>\n
Now, I add it whenever I say, \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n One thing I don\u2019t ever have to apologize for is being late. I\u2019m early! All old coots are early. And not just for early bird specials. We\u2019re early for everything.<\/p>\n Have you ever been in a doctor\u2019s office waiting room and overheard the receptionist say, \u201cI\u2019m sorry, sir, your appointment is tomorrow.\u201d<\/p>\n Now, that\u2019s really early. But not as embarrassing as when we show up at a party where the invitation said it starts at seven o\u2019clock. We arrive a few minutes before seven and get, \u201cOh, you\u2019re here already? Come in. Jane is in the shower, and I have to go to the store to pick up some ice.\u201d<\/p>\n That\u2019s when I parade out a, \u201cI\u2019m sorry,\u201d and then stupidly add, \u201cDo you mind if I open this bottle of white wine.\u201d<\/p>\n One might expect us to arrive late, in the polite way, like everyone else. But we can\u2019t do it. It\u2019s not in our DNA. I suggest you tell old coot invitees a later arrival time than the others. This will prevent an awkward situation for both of you.<\/p>\n If these comments offend you in some way, \u201cI\u2019m sorry.\u201d Plus, the rest of the junk I recommended saying.<\/p>\n