{"id":102434,"date":"2024-07-24T08:46:53","date_gmt":"2024-07-24T12:46:53","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.owegopennysaver.com\/PS\/?p=102434"},"modified":"2024-07-24T08:46:53","modified_gmt":"2024-07-24T12:46:53","slug":"the-old-coot-leans-to-the-left-and-the-right","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.owegopennysaver.com\/PS\/2024\/07\/24\/the-old-coot-leans-to-the-left-and-the-right\/","title":{"rendered":"The Old Coot leans to the left, and the right"},"content":{"rendered":"

By Merlin Lessler —<\/span><\/p>\n

I have a balance problem. I\u2019ve had it for years; I get along just fine with it. I often use a walking stick, the same one I used to hike up the high peaks in the White Mountains of New Hampshire with my daughters and son. It was a great adventure every year starting in the mid 1970\u2019s and ending with my last climb when I turned 75. <\/span><\/p>\n

Anyhow, the nerves in my legs have gone on strike; they tell my brain that I am tilting to the side, when I\u2019m not. It makes me adjust to the \u201cfake news\u201d from below. My eyes recognize the lie and set me straight. In the process, I wander from vertical a bit.<\/span><\/p>\n

When someone asked me what was wrong when they saw me with a stick I would go into a long windbag explanation of the balance issue. Now I lie, \u201cOh no big deal, I have a trick knee.\u201d (Who doesn\u2019t at my age?)  <\/span><\/p>\n

I had two reasons for the lie. When I had explained the balance quirk it was too much information and people\u2019s eyes glazed over. And, their reply usually was, \u201cI always knew you were unbalanced!\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

The other day I was walking along East Main Street; Sister Mary O\u2019Brien was coming toward me on the opposite side of the road. <\/span><\/p>\n

\u201cHey Old Coot,\u201d she yelled over to me. \u201cWhat\u2019s going on with the stick?\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

I couldn\u2019t lie to her; she can spot a lie a mile away, so I went into the balance issue. She didn\u2019t say it, but I could read what the grin on her face said, \u201cI always thought you were unbalanced, ha ha!\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n

I\u2019m making this whole thing sound more of an issue than it is. It compromises my lifestyle, not at all. Except, there is always an exception, isn\u2019t there. Except when I walk out of a bar or restaurant serving adult beverages, places I go without the walking stick. When I get up to leave, and have to weave through a crowd of people and around tables, I look a little tipsy. <\/span><\/p>\n

I get a look that says, \u201cLook at that old guy; he\u2019s drunk.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

When I bump into people, or a table, I quickly explain, \u201cI\u2019m not drunk; I have a balance problem.\u201d <\/span><\/p>\n

I doubt if anyone believes it. But it makes me feel good. The only real danger I face is getting stopped by the police and made to walk a white line. I\u2019d fail. I\u2019d have to sit in the slammer until a blood test showed my beverage of choice had been Pepsi Cola. <\/span><\/p>\n

Comments, complaints? \u2013 Send to mlessler7@gmail.com<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

By Merlin Lessler — I have a balance problem. I\u2019ve had it for years; I get along just fine with it. 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